


The Mating Habits Of Hawks And Hulks.

by Hulk_Stanner



Category: Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Caring Hulk, Fisting, For Once..., Hulk Sex, Hulk gets everything, Lots of Sex, M/M, Protective Hulk, References to Bruce's Terrible Pick Up Lines..., Smut, Warm Fluffiness, cuz I was tired of all the angst..., everyone is happy and sane and safe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-11
Updated: 2017-12-11
Packaged: 2019-02-13 11:13:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12982848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hulk_Stanner/pseuds/Hulk_Stanner
Summary: Clint wants to do unspeakable things with the Hulk. Bruce helps.





	The Mating Habits Of Hawks And Hulks.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay guys, so this is actually a sort of side chapter from a much longer 'Loki redemption fic' I'm working on but, seeing as I have no idea how long it's actually gonna take me to finish it bc I keep getting writers block for friggin two years and I hate posting incomplete things, I decided that since Bruce, Clint and Hulk keep stealing their own chapters in it, and since this one doesn't really involve any of the actual main plot from that story and can be read on its own, I figured I would post this chapter as an individual story for now since I pretty much wrote it for the pure, unabashed Hulk!smut and fluffiness anyways... basically all you need to know is that Bruce and Clint have been together for a while now, Bruce and Hulk are mostly communicating with each other and not fighting for control anymore, and Clint is making questionable life choices involving very large things that go up his ass because of a comment Bruce made about how Clint shouldn't suggest things he's not fully prepared to go through with, especially where the Hulk is concerned... needless to say, Clint takes this all very literally and decides he's definitely gonna do that bc he's Clint Mother Fucking Barton, and why wouldn't he...?
> 
> Also, the title is a joke from the original fic I pulled this from... let's just say that Bruce uses terrible pick up lines, Hulk hears them, and Clint just has to go and take them literally...
> 
> Also, I had to type this on my smartphone bc my computer is a piece of dog shit that died a few months back, so if there's any glaring spelling mistakes or typos that my stupid phone missed (or changed for no reason cos it likes to do that) or that I missed in my editing, then feel free to highlight it for me and send a PM with whatever it is and I'll do my best to get it fixed up asap since I haveta post these from the shopping centre using the free wifi since I have no credit and no internet at home... :(
> 
> Anyways, enough of my rambling now! Enjoy the Hulk!smut!

Clint groaned obscenely and arched his back as Bruce twisted his wrist a little, stretching him further and carefully adding another finger, the three already inside him brushing his prostate as he worked Clint further open, stroking his cock lightly as he pressed deeper, his thumb probing the archers entrance.

Clint whined and pressed himself back, spreading his legs as much as he could from this position, willing Bruce o just hurry up and stop teasing already.  
"Bruuuce!" Clint panted and tried to shove his ass back onto Bruce's fingers but the scientist followed the movement with his hand, the other pressing in the middle of Clint's back, forcing him to still.

"Be patient, you. You're the one who decided you wanted to try and fit the Other Guys dick in your ass so, you can lie there and take it while I make sure you're not going to end up with some sort of horrible rupture from I'll-preparation..."  
Bruce slid his thumb in next to his fingers as he spoke, spreading his hand a little then twisting as he worked to push past his knuckles.

Clint grasped the sheets in front of him, resting his head on his outstretched arms, crying out softly as Bruce pushed past the last bit of resistance, his hand slipping in up to the wrist and Clint actually whimpered, his brain short-circuiting at the feel of being so stretched and full, Bruce's knuckles brushing against his prostate with every little movement, sending sparks of white-hot pleasure up and down Clint's spine.

The archer shuddered and groaned again when Bruce started thrusting, shallowly and Clint pushed back to meet him, eyes rolled back in his head and it occurred to him that this was just the beginning...

For the past two weeks or so, Clint and Bruce had been steadily working towards being able to fit something rather much larger inside of Clint's ass and, in doing so had discovered that the archer had quite a considerable size kink... not the Clint hadn't known about that before, only now it was becoming somewhat of an ongoing challenge for both he and Bruce to see just _how far_ Clint could really stretch...

Bruce had insisted that if Clint was going to be 'mating' with the Hulk, then he first had make sure that it was actually physically possible for Clint to 'mate' with the Hulk.  
Clint had had fun pointing out that this meant Bruce would have to be naked in the lab if he wanted accurate measurements, since he insisted on using science to determine whether or not it was possible as opposed to just letting Clint judge for himself.

Admittedly, once Bruce had all of the 'necessary data' collected, Clint had a lot more fun proving to Bruce that it was not only going to be possible but, also highly enjoyable for all of them... Hence, how Clint now found himself in his current position, face-down on Bruce's reinforced (thank you Tony Stark!) bed, the scientists entire hand up his ass, splitting him open, thrusting harder now and Clint was damned if he wasn't entirely ready for more and Bruce just fucking knew it too but, apparently Bruce was an ass and liked to torture him like the truely sadistic little fuck that he was and, Clint swore, one of these days he was going to prove to everyone that Bruce's nice guy thing was just an act and he was really planning to stealthily take it ver the world with science...

"Bruce! Please!?" Clint whined, shoving back with his hips. He was so not above begging by this point.

Bruce brushed his fee hand through the archers sweaty hair and said; "Okay, in a moment... you sure you're ready?"

"Oh, god! Fuck, yes! Yes dammit! Bruce! I am so fucking ready for this!"  
Clint could practically _hear_ Bruce smirking behind him as he carefully removed his hand, and Clint relaxed all of his muscles so as not to clench up. 'Fuck, he loved being able to control his physical responses at will...' Although, he doubts this is what S.H.I.E.L.D or Coulson had in mind when they insisted he continue to hone these particular skills...

The archer felt Bruce shift behind him and, a moment later there was the slightly cool sensation of more lube being poured into his stretched entrance and, Clint used all his control to keep from clenching at the unexpected sensation.

"Sorry... but I figure there's no such thing as _too much_ lube in this particular situation..."  
Clint huffed a slight, breathless laugh as Bruce leaned down and said: "See you on the other side, Cupid..."

Clint heard Bruce shifting again, then felt the bed dip considerably and he glanced over his shoulder, grinning broadly. "Hey, Big Guy."

The Hulk huffed slightly as he leaned down, apparently sensing the irony in the nickname and stroked a large, broad palm down Clint's back.  
"Now Cupid ready to finish 'mating.'" The giant rumbled, and Clint wriggled slightly beneath the massive frame behind him.  
"Yep. Sure am. Bruce made sure you're not gonna accidentally break me or anything... not that I ever thought you were." Clint added, then smirked a little. "Bruce worries too much."

He received a short, rumbling snort of laughter at that and Hulk lifted Clint's hips up gently in his large hands as he agreed; "Banner always worries. Hulk not worried. Cupid is tough."

Clint only had a moment to grin at that before the pleased smirk was wiped off his face by the most intense pleasurable thing he'd ever felt. The pressure bearing down on him was more than anything he had ever experienced, the stretch just this side of painful, every single nerve ending in Clint'a body was firing at once with slightly confused signals of 'pleasure-pain-hot-full-too much! So good! More!' and Clint let out a somewhat broken cry as he was manoeuvred backwards, so much more slowly than he had expected and he could feel every single massive inch, sliding inexorably forward, Clint's entire lower body and torso virtually held in place by the huge hands wrapped around him, preventing him from so much as wriggling, never mind actually moving.  
The heat was incredible and Clint swore that being held like this by the Hulk was like being held in place by a giant, living furnace..

Normally there would have been some kind of warning bells going off in Clint's mind by this point - never before had he felt so completely unconcerned and, even strangely comfortable with the almost complete inability to move or escape.  
It was then Clint realised he felt safe - for perhaps the first time he could ever remember - truely, properly safe.  
The part of his brain that had realised this had apparently also realised that the reason he couldn't move, aside from the obvious, was probably because the Hulk didn't want him thrashing around like a lust-addled lunatic and more than likely hurting himself in the process. Well, fuck.

Clint relaxed completely then, letting himself go limp and pliant, letting the Other Guy decide when he thought Clint was ready for more - trusting both he and Bruce with a level of control he had allowed no one else to have over him before - not even Tasha or Phil, whom he trusted with his life...

A low rumble sounded right next to his ear and the hot breath made him shiver pleasantly. "Cupid okay?"

"Fuck, yeah, Cupid's okay... Cupid's more than okay... Fuck, you're warm... how're you so fucking warm? I love it!" Clint's filters were pretty much trashed by this point, not that it seemed to matter as Hulk ignored the rambled question, taking Clint's apparent more-than-okayness as a sign that moving was totally okay now that Clint had calmed down, and wasn't going to try to wriggle out of his grip and twist himself into a pretzel in his excitement.

"Good." Was the short reply he got before there was a slow, dragging, careful slide out before the inevitable push back in. Now that there was a whole lot more friction, Clint was extremely glad that Hulk had thought to hold him still because if he hadn't the archer was pretty sure he would've torn himself apart, shaking and twitching as he was at the now constant pressure on his prostate, the thick green member pressing and rubbing at every single part of his insides, driving him mad with need and sensation.

Clint knew he wasn't going to last long, especially not after the long, slow torture that Bruce had inflicted upon him beforehand and the low, primal huffs, grunts and growls from behind him literally reverberating through his bones, coupled with the intense sensations of pleasure were pushing him ever closer...

Clint fell over the edge without even being touched, his cock throbbing almost painfully beneath him as he came all over Bruce's sheets, his muscles spawning and clamping down as his body attempted to jerk violently, the movement restrained by the large hands still holding him and, the feral sounding growl behind him almost made him cum again...

As Clint slowly came down from the high, a quiet, peaceful kind of euphoria settling over him, he could feel the tension in the large green body behind him. The archer smiled happily and said; "It's okay, you can keep going, just... turn me round, yeah? I sorta wanna see you now..."

Clint heard another low growl before he was slid off the enormous green cock, flipped over and carefully repositioned in Hulks lap.  
A soft cry left him, to mingle with the low grunt of pleasure when Clint slid down, easily, this new position seating the green behemoth even deeper inside him and Clint whimpered, falling forward to rest his head on the broad, muscled chest, his hands going weakly to massive shoulders as the Hulk started moving again, a little faster and harder now that Clint's sated body offered no resistance.

Clint tilted his head slightly so he could watch Hulks facial expressions through jazzy eyes and, once he saw he couldn't look away. Anger and tension and, even concern or confusion were all fairly common expressions to the Hulks countenance but, Clint was fairly sure that nobody had ever seen anything like the look of pure satisfaction and unrestrained happy bliss that the archer was being graced with now.  
It gave him a warm feeling in the pit of his stomach to know that he was the one that caused it.

Clint could feel the deep, heavy breaths becoming shorter and quicker, could feel ever pound of tension in the tightly coiled muscles beneath him, hear every low grunt and deep, primal growl as he took everything he was given and, there was just no way to even slightly prepare himself for the flood that came next...

God! If he'd thought there was pressure before, it was nothing compared to the feel of massive amounts of Hulk's semen being pumped into him as the huge cock throbbed inside him, most of the mess running down Clint's thighs as there just wasn't room for anything more inside him and, the archer just held on for the ride, his own cock twitching in a mostly dry orgasm at the one-deep feral _snarl_ that ripped through the air and shook Clint's body like a leaf in the solid grip he was held in.

Clint gazed up, tiredly, a dopey smile on his face and, green eyes looked back at him with the most peaceful expression Clint had ever seen on the huge face.  
"That was awesome." Clint said, and Hulk huffed an agreement as he carefully lifted Clint off, tucking him in to his large chest and Clint wriggled as he felt more mess leak from his thoroughly abused hole and down his legs. "You made a mess of me." He grinned.

"Cupid not seem to mind." Hulk rumbled, with a grin of his own.

Clint gave a quiet chuckle, leaning up to give the giant a kiss. "Nope. Cupid doesn't mind at all." He grinned a little more wickedly now. "Bruce might though, since you're covered in it too... serves him right for being an incredible tease!"

Hulk's face split into what Clint had come to call his 'shit is gonna get smashed and it's gonna be awesome' grin and rumbled back; "Hulk won't clean up then."

Clint couldn't help it. He started laughing, rather uncontrollably, as Hulk started to shrink down into Bruce and, he was still giggling like a lion when the scientist blinked up at him from the bed and asked; "Why are you laughing?"  
This just made Clint laugh harder.  
"What? Clint... what did you do?" Bruce asked, almost wearily then; "No, wait. What did He do?"

Clint managed to control his giggling enough to swipe his hand through a considerably large hold of mess on Bruce's leg and, holding his hand up, said; "I think some of your evil rubbed off on him... he's decided to make you do the clean up!" Clint collapsed into fits of laughter again as Bruce looked down at them both eyeing the - frankly terrifying - amount of semen all over them with a slightly shocked expression, then said; "Oh my god. This is never going to come out of the sheets... or my hair... Clint! What did you do? Roll in it?"

Clint snorted in amusement and said; "No... but I wouldn't give Hulk the idea if I were you, 'cos I'm pretty sure he did this just to spite you..."

Bruce groaned and buried his face in his hands. "That's it. You are a bad influence and I am going to pay you back later for this..."

"Why me?" Clint asked, with a slight whine.

Bruce lifted his head and grinned at him. "Because, I can't actually do anything about the Hulk being an ass, but I can sure as hell do something about you encouraging him to be one..."

Clint groaned and flopped over onto a relatively clean patch of sheet. One of these days he was going to expose Bruce for the truly _evil_ genius he was...

**Author's Note:**

> For anyone who's wondering exactly how Clint manages to not get radiation poisoning because of this: There was a serum Bruce created in an episode of 'Earths's Mightiest Heroes' called 'Gamma World' that basically inoculated Clint from the gamma radiation at least temporarily so, I'm going with the logic that if he could make a temporary one in a shack, in a hurry, when the world was ending and he probably didn't have the best equipment, then he could definitely come up with a better, more permanent one in the labs at Stark Tower when he was actually planning on needing it...
> 
> Also, I totally headcannon the fact that even the Hulk cares more about Clint's wellbeing and safety than Clint does... because Clint makes terrible life decisions and doesn't actually know the meaning of the words 'safety' 'precaution' or 'careful' and everyone knows it.
> 
> Also, yeah. I just love writing Hulk as a great big marshmallow who looks after his teammates and totally gets things and he and Bruce are actually not hating each other bc I can't bear the angst of so much of Bruce and Hulk's lives cos it makes cry... so, yeah. Fluff. And silliness. And everybody being a family and happy and stuff...
> 
> On that note, I figure since Hulk is able to stay Hulked out for years on some occasions and although he's always technically angry he's not always Angry angry, it is totally possible for him to remain for at least a few minutes after he calms down or whatever instead of just Bruceing out straight away... (also, seeing Thor: Ragnarök made me want to write this particular piece even more than I already did before I saw it, Bc it pretty much just gave me movie Hulk the exact way I always wanted him!) Also bc I just really wanted Hulk and Clint being little shits bc EMH has ruined me forever with their bromance! ;D
> 
> Also; Yes. Bruce is totally planning on stealthily taking over the world with science, and no one can convince me otherwise! ;)


End file.
